The Path of Darkness is Quick, But Not Stronger

It always amazes me what can happen when I'm not paying attention. For the past several weeks, months perhaps, I have been so focused on whatever is going wrong at the moment, that it's pulled me away from everything that's going right. Or at least NOT wrong. I even used this excuse last night in a huge argument with my own wife!

Given the fact that we are all human, and we are all prone to wander off the path, it's not that surprising. What is surprising is how much I didn't actually notice it. So many wonderful things have been happening for my wife lately - seriously putting the Law of Attraction to work for her - that I have looked at all of her success with jealousy.

Yes, I'm well aware that I shouldn't be jealous of someone else's success - especially my own wife. But apparently I had been so focused on my own issues that The Green-Eyed Monster raised it's ugly head yesterday and...

Well, no point in rehashing what transpired. The point is that it can quickly get the best of us if we're not careful. And it has definitely been lurking in the shadows over the past several months.

Let me just say for the public record that I am extraordinarily excited and happy for all the opportunities that my wife has been getting. There is no one other than her that's more excited about her life than I am.

I am, however, armed with this lack of self worth that I frequently battle against, stemming from my childhood that I have never completely obliterated. So when her life took a turn for the better, a little voice popped into my head and said, "Well, what about me?"

And so began the downward spiral. I began to focus on lack instead of abundance. And as we all know, you focus on one thing too long, and life gives you more of the same. I began to think my life wasn't as good as hers - and so it began to manifest itself exactly that way. And the more I compared my life and hers, the worse and worse it got. So, to reiterate, I had no idea what I was in process of doing. I began to believe that it was the world doing this, things going from bad to worse. I completely forgot it was all in my own mind. I was in control of this "uncontrollable" tempest.

At least until I took the time to meditate this morning, and it all became clear. I was doing it all myself, simply because I stopped paying attention to what I was doing. This again proves the Law of Attraction works. She focused on success. She's on the verge of success beyond her wildest dreams. I focused on what I didn't have. I got more of what I didn't have. The Law works, simply, beautifully, perfectly.

As a gesture of what I suddenly realized, The Universe gave me a sign. I had sat down at my computer to restart my daily, and most infrequent, positive tweet blog, and there at the very top of my twitter feed was this quote from The Barefoot Doctor:

The real choice in every moment is whether to rejoice in being alive & be of good cheer or default to self-pity & indulge the fear. Rejoice!

I think that about sums it up. So I am apologizing publicly to my wife, who I caused unnecessary stress and hurt while I was wallowing around in self-pity. I apologize to my readers, if you have wanted to have positivity in your life and was denied that by my actions. And I apologize to myself and The Universe for having stepped into that dark place to begin with.

So we begin the journey toward the light again.